WTF Am I Even Doing Here?

I should be wandering the earth like a nomad, waiting tables, hauling dirt, pouring coffee, doing whatever shit gets me to the next destination. I should be seeing everything, experiencing everything, becoming a part of everything and everyone. 

Listening to waterfalls cascade down the mountain, head-banging to heavy metal until my heck hurts, running, running, and running until my muscles burn and my legs give out from under me and my face contorts and I cry and cry and cry and cry and cry and cry….

And then the sky. And all the stars. They never try to control me. They never make me say what I want to keep private. They never push their shit agenda on me or act selfishly or reach down with bony wrinkly hands and tell me what I already know. They just hang and they just be. No expectations. No effort. No bullshit. 

Live and let be. Fuck it all. 


3 thoughts on “WTF Am I Even Doing Here?

  1. There are things I try never to figure out. I like black boxes, if they work. But you’ve just explained why I love the sky, the stars, twilight, the outdoors. It’s free, and private, and personal, and despite how wide open it is, it’s comforting.
    You’re really amazing, you know.

    Liked by 1 person

      • I love traveling alone on trails, or swimming in lakes. And the ocean, the perfect meeting of sky and beach and horizon. I’ve taken literally thousands of pictures if the sky. It’s one of the few things in life that is actually better and more interesting when it’s chaotic.

        Liked by 1 person

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